Recently, I had the opportunity for a candid conversation with a very close friend. She commented that C is so lucky to have us as parents. I asked why? She said basically that she would have challenged her kid had they spoken their truth. It was such an interesting observation, completely flipped my prospective on its head. It never occurred to me to challenge her identity.
Seeing Q, our cis, now four-year-old who strongly identifies as male, has strengthened my confidence, belief and resolve in supporting trans people and their right to identify as they choose. Watching my four-year-old tell me he will not shop for dinosaur socks in the “girls” section affirms the fact that children, in fact, ABSOLUTELY have a gender identity from the youngest of ages. I, of course, respond that I didn’t realize that socks have vaginas or penises (sorry kid, you got me as your mom). We leave the girls section and find man socks in the dollar section that he proudly draws up to his thighs and dons for preschool.
No more would I force Q to be someone he is not, would I imprison my daughter. Each of us is made up of a complex, beautiful, mosaic of feminine, masculine and somewhere in between.